The 10 laws of Jack


Everything in nature must adhere to laws — physics, math, the food chain, the bro code… everything has it’s fundamental guideposts to follow. The Jackverse is not immune to such laws. Of course, in the Jackverse, only I must really abide by these laws — even should the Dude himself pass by, he would not be required to abide. Even so, I implore you to read on. In the end, you’ll only wind up learning more about Jack than you probably ever cared to know. And so, with that — wrap your fingers around your favorite beverage (or whatever you like to wrap your fingers around) and let’s get on with the Laws O’ jack.

Law the first: Above all else, be true to the soul

I’m not talking about James Brown (though, if you like to bring your truth to the foot of the King of Soul, feel free) — I’m talking about that intangible ‘thing’ that makes you, you. We all have different elements that blend together to make our souls unique. Are you a childish artist with sleeve made of heart meat? If so… WELCOME TO MY CLUB! You might be, at your core, a business person, or an competitor. Whatever it is you are, be true to it.

Law the second: Be kind to others

How small is the world? Yes, the Earth has a polar radius of 3,950 miles, but don’t let that measurement fool you — the world is tiny. Such a microscopic microcosm means one thing — what comes around goes around really quickly. Because of this — be kind to others. If you’re not, that bad juju will get around fast and bite you on the hinder before you can say “I’m sorry I spread rumors about you and that tub of liver!”

Law the third: ‘See’ with an open mind, ‘think’ with wide eyes

Bigotry, homophobia, sexism, classism — aren’t those issues that should already be in our past? Shouldn’t we be embarrassed that such topics still make the news? Archie Bunker, it’s time for you to put that stogey out and hug George Jefferson now. Mr. Furely, don’t you think Jack Tripper is due for a bug old kiss on the cheek? You see where I’m going with this?

Law the fourth: Love and respect your significant other as if every day were their birthday and valentines all rolled up into one

Seriously… you married or committed to that person for a reason. You loved them. Now, stop brushing them aside and give them an attention and affection they so deserve! A little bow-chikka might help as well.

Law the fifth: Music is the food of life

This is simple — without music, we might as well be living in a vacuum. I always have music near me… it can help to lift your spirits or inspire you to great things.

Law the sixth: Never trust big business

No matter what they say, big business cares for only one thing — your money. They don’t want your friendship, to win your trust, be your friend, hold your hand or your hair when you’re puking your guts up into a toilet bowl. in the end, big business wants your soul, you bank account number, and your first born child.

Law the seventh: You cannot pick your family

You can pick your nose, your friends, your seat (either in chair or butt form)… but you cannot pick your family.  This has meaning on so many levels and how you interpret is completely up to you. But know this — there may come a time when the choice between your sanity and your family becomes a reality. Should that happen, pick reality (and not in “TV form”).

Law the eighth: Be true to your art

Artists exist for a reason — because we are forged from wondrous stuff. The life of an artist is a huge challenge. Just making a living, in many cases, is enough to drive most away from their craft. No matter where the thread of life leads the artist, they will wind up coming back to their art. They have to, else be driven into the depths of madness. One cannot lie to their art. In doing so they are doing nothing more than lying to a much deeper truth.

Law the ninth: Love your job or job your love

I really have no idea what that means. It’s a cryptic way of me trying to say, “If you don’t love your job, find one you can love”. I know, I know, this one is tough. Ultimately you have to pay the bills. If you don’t eat, you don’t live and if you don’t make a dollah, you don’t eat. It’s a vicious cycle that few can break. The problem comes when you hate a job you do 40-60 hours a week (which averages out to almost a third of your week). When this happens, you’re spending 30% of your time frustrated, angry, and resentful. That spills over to your private life and can, in the end, take a serious toll on family and relationships. How many marriages end up in divorce thanks to a bad job situation? Do yourself a favor, break that tie that binds your heart and soul to a very dark place before it’s too late.

Law the tenth: Friends are an integral part of life

Writers and other artistic types can easily fall into themselves only to disappear from society. We do this for a number of reasons: to work through demons that need to then be placed on the page, to recharge their batteries, or just to hide from the beast called “reality”. but even when that dark place calls, one should never neglect friendships. We’re all on this ship called Earth together and we only get one chance to make the most out of it. Make the most out of it with company, so “most” is “most-er”, or even “most-est”. And never forget, when friends are in need — be there for them. Fear not, they will return the favor at some point.

And there you have it — The 10 laws of Jack. I hope these laws have given you something to think about. Maybe, just maybe, you can make one (or more) of these laws your own. If you do, toss Jack a hug, as “hugs” are the unwritten “twelfth law of Jack”.