Most Evilest Books Ever Written… for film


Forget the Satanic Bible by Anton Lavey — I’m talkin’ pure, nasty, ugly evil. This is the kind of evil that makes demons and other vile nasties appear out of nowhere, the kind that turns mortal men and women into banshees, vampires, and soul-sucking thingies. Dare you gaze upon the books I mention here? Dare you utter the phrase “klaatu barada nikto” and gaze inside the wonders of the damned?

Let’s see just how brave you are.

The Book of the Dead (Evil Dead)

Within this book is housed a spirit so evil, it managed to cause Bruce Campbell to get so tightly pigeonholed into a franchise his acting career would be officially and forever refer back to the fact that he was the man in the Evil Dead series. Now that’s some power! But even though The Book of the Dead did unleash a hell storm of evil on the career of Bruce Campbell, it gave a legion of fans something to quote, love, and always and ever hope for yet another entry in the franchise.

By the way — I love these films and have the utmost respect for Mr. Campbell. So suck it Book of the Dead! And you can’t hide yourself in sequels by calling yourself Necronomicon Ex Mortis. We see right through your ruse.

The Book of Pure Evil

Why is this book so evil? Mostly because it is part of a Fear.net series that COULD be Barney Stinson-level AWESOME… but falls well short. Why? Well, poor acting is primarily the issue at hand. Yes, the show is tongue in cheeky; but a good cast of actors could take this from being low-grade yucks to one fuckall of a fun romp. So that book of PURE EVIL Todd is trying to vanquish will most likely get vanquished by poor ratings before the hand of pure Todd. But I will continue watching and hope the weekly series gets itself together and becomes something special. Seriously, you remember how Star Trek: TNG started out — dare I say “Farpoint”?

The Grimoire (Charmed)

This book contained all the yummy evil magic filled with spells to counter those from The Book of Shadows. Why is this book on my list? Because it worked it’s tail off to take down the likes of Shannon Doherty and Rose McGowan and helped to make Wicca and magic ALMOST a household thing. Besides, a book acting against those lovelies has to have some pretty wicked mojo going for it, otherwise it’ll just fade into the background like a textbook in a library.

The Grand Grimoire

If I say the name Julian Sands, women will swoon and men will fall into piques of shame. It was Sands’ character in Warlock that wove his magical, british-accented spell over hundreds upon hundreds of fans. Anyone that enjoys a good ’80s horror romp will enjoy this film. Why is The Grand Grimoire on this list? This book supposedly contained the name of God. If the true name can be spoken backwards, the universe will end. Anyone watching the film was shown the letters of the word, but not the actual name. Sands’ character does not get beyond pronouncing the first syllable before he is killed.

Now that is powerful. One syllable to end them all! BWAHAHAHAHA!

 


2 thoughts on “Most Evilest Books Ever Written… for film

  1. More nominees:
    Confessions of a Guidette, by Snooki
    If I Did It, by O.J. Simpson
    How to Be Famous, by Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt

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