As most of you know, I have a vested interest in this subject. Why? First and foremost, I placed the survival of mankind on the shoulders of one Bethany Nitshimi. I did this knowing I might lose the attention of some fans of the genre — a fact I am perfectly fine with. Why? For so long, women in post-apocalyptic literature have been relegated to eye candy, relationship fodder, damsels in distress, or (on occasion) a ripped-dress wearing clone with unrealistic fighting abilities (played to the nines by Milla Jovavitch). Some may call “bias” on this; but, to me, the continued portrayal of women as a weakness in the apocalypse, is an insufferable insult.
The Rusty Blade
Whisper into my ear
Make love to my damaged sorrow
With your self-defeating fear.
What little light you brought to life
Is forfeit now and ever
We’ll dance a twisted spider walk
To begin a new endeavor.
My rusted blade it dives and twists
Between your filthy breath
I’ll carve for you a new beginning
Some delightful precious death.
Weep now, my dearest lovely bones
Your tears I will consume
And before your light is extinguished
I’ll waltz you to your tomb.
I could come up with lists of horror films to fit nearly any topic. This time around, I want to introduce you to my favorite female-centric horror films. What does that mean? Simple — horror films that center around a female protagonist, a female killer, or films that just exude femme de la macabre! So, let’s all don our favorite heels and pencil skirts and get this bitch on the road!
This is Halloween, this is Halloween Pumpkins scream in the dead of night.
Ah the lyrics to one of my favorite animated films — Nightmare Before Christmas. It’s that time of year and everyone needs to have their horror films queued up and ready to go. What’s that you say? You have no idea where to begin? Well, we can’t have that. October is the time in which we should all be enjoying a good horror movie marathon. Even better — Halloween-themed movie marathons. It’s a pseudo-recursive theme and I’m going to arm you with a few outstanding films to get you moving in the right direction.
That’s right, ladies and gentlefreaks of the Jackverse, even the Zombie King can be sent shivering under his blankets. No! You say? Yes…I retort. But what in the world could frighten someone who spends his days and nights thinking of ways to set his readers skin crawling with undead and other frightening delights? Well, I’m going to play a rousing game of ‘fess up’, so you can know what haunts my nightmares.
It’s that time of the year my lovelies — October. That means but one thing, Halloween is right around the corner. And although many/most of us are too old to enjoy the age-old tradition of trick or treating, that doesn’t mean we can’t have some adult-flavored fun on this most glorious of holiday seasons!
With that in mind, I’ve come up with a few ideas for you to rip off so your Halloween is as glorious as the Zombie Kings! I’ll run this as a series…so as to not inundate the jackverse with information. So, what in the hell am I blathering on about? On with the ideas!
In celebration of this most recent Friday the 13th, I thought it would be a fun task of listing out my top thirteen horror films. From this list, you can pick and choose which horrific delights you watch on the second most spooky night of the year (top honors, naturally, going to Halloween). And so, without further adieu, I give to you, my loyal readers, my top 13 all time favorite horror films.
It’s over. Season two of American Horror Story completed last week. And now, American television is left with a vast cavern of a whole. How is that? When there is so much quality programming on at the moment, how is is possible a single show could leave behind such a gaping abyss?
It was that good.
Muhaha! It’s Halloween… not only in the Jackverse, but EVERYWHERE! It’s time for everyone of a spookier nature to crawl out from under the planks and graves to walk among the normal and living. Freak flags are high on this, the most coveted of holidays for the horror-loving ilk. Normally I would have loved to go off on some interesting spooktacular tangent about a horror film or how Halloween helped to mold me into who and what I am today. But tragedy struck the shores of our east coast. Authors and film makers cannot best the kind of tragedy wrought by Mother Nature. That is horror…wondering if loved ones and friends have survived the flooding, fires, and wind. And as those on the East coast attempt to piece their lives back together, mourn those that they lost, and try to bring their communities back to life — know that we are all beside you.
Welcome back to Hell! You’ve purchased your ticket and are ready to see a cage match worthy of a soundtrack by GWAR!
Our last match saw the Creeper from Jeepers Creepers barely edging out the voice and pimp coat of Candyman. This time around, the ol’ Creeper’s suffering could be legendary… even in Hell!
That’s right, the Creeper goes up against the leader of the Cenobites — Pinhead.
The Monster Cage Match continues on. Last time the fight from Hell took place, Candyman took down Freddie Kreuger. It was snark vs. basso profundo — with ‘the voice’ coming out on top!
This time around Candyman has to go up against a rather horrible foe with nasty leather wings and a penchant for eyeballs and human meat. Of course every big nasty has it’s achilles; but is the Creeper’s flaw enough to allow the Candyman to take it down? Let’s find out.
In the first bought of the Monster Mash, Freddy Krueger put a stop to any possible sparkly, shimmery vampire shenanigans. But this time, Freddy is up against a foe with considerably less teen appeal. Can Freddy defend the crown of bone and blood he currently wears atop is ragged and flensed head? Let’s find out.
It’s October and October means Halloween. Halloween means horror and horror means monsters. We all have our favorite monsters, but have we ever wondered just which monsters would win in a fight to the death (or undeath, as it were)? Well, I’ve always wondered this very thing, so I wanted to take some time (maybe even the rest of October) to answer the question.